Any Anchor Can Be Reset (No Matter How Beloved)

A few months ago, I invited a good friend over for coffee. We hadn’t seen one another in years, so I was excited to reconnect. Little did I know that our long-awaited reunion would forever change the way I looked at my most treasured kitchen countertop appliances. My beloved, my precious, my Keurig.

It was love at first sight with my first Keurig, and it all came down to its simplicity. Pop the top and insert the pod. With ZERO clean-up and no messy coffee grinds, it was a slice of instant gratification within minutes. Who could have asked for a better way to start the day?

As much as this sounds like a vision of eternal caffeinated bliss, this illusion of love came crumbling down when my friend, in just a few words, showed me something about my Keurig that I could never unsee. In preparation for her visit, I asked her what kind of coffee she liked and if she liked it in any particular way. Initially, she said, “No, I’m not picky, whatever you have is great.”

“Great,” I said. “I have a Keurig with a bunch of different flavors–“ to which she cut me off immediately.

“Oh, no, Joe. I don’t drink coffee from a pod machine.” I instantly reevaluated her character and value as my friend. How dare she insult my favorite appliance. Before I responded impulsively, I gathered myself, “Oh? And why don’t you like the Keurig?”

She responded, “Are you aware of the bacteria that can build up inside that machine?”

“Bacteria?” I said because little did she know, I’m a closet germ-a-phobe. She’d just poked at one of my core values–– good health!

Unbeknownst to her, I quickly deferred to Siri who indeed confirmed that coffee pod machines need to be cleaned regularly or there can be some nasty build-up within the tubing.

In that one statement, my friend unwittingly put my need for simplicity, efficiency, and good health at risk. Suddenly, my favorite of all kitchen machines without warning became my nemesis. Because of this new information, I would never be able to look at Keurig or any other coffee pod machine the same way.

Inadvertently, even though I was upset at learning this information, I now trusted her even more than I had previously. Now that I saw her as someone who had helpful knowledge when it came to coffee, she shared that the healthiest and most efficient way to make coffee was the coffee pour-over. With this new revelation, I immediately clicked on Amazon, bought the most highly rated one they had, and felt great about doing it.

So, you may be wondering how this story is a metaphor for helping you communicate with more purpose, power, and impact.

Very simple:

The key to resistance/barrier removal or “objection handling” is to identify where your prospect’s values and behaviors contradict each other. The values that “anchored” my love for the Keurig were:

  • Simplicity
  • Efficiency
  • Timesaving


However, once an even more important value (good health) was put at risk, along with the other three values mentioned above, my anchor was reset. My goals and values were put at risk (dissonance created – bad feeling), there was urgency for me to change, and then an option more aligned with my goals and values was presented (resonance created – good feeling).

When, not if, you experience resistance from someone you are helping to reset an anchor, try this simple three-step anchor resetting process:

Step 1: Understand Their Values

– Ask questions to uncover what the person values most.

– Listen carefully to their responses and identify their core priorities.

Step 2: Share Relevant Insights

– Find a compelling insight, preferably from a third party, that highlights potential risks or opportunities related to their values.

– Connect this insight to their core values and concerns.

Step 3: Offer a Value-Aligned Solution

– Introduce your product or service as a solution that better aligns with their values and addresses their concerns.

– Emphasize how your solution mitigates risks and enhances their alignment with what they said they value most.

If my non-salesperson friend unwittingly sold me on the coffee pour-over, which I used to think was a silly thing only reserved for hipsters, imagine what you can do with a little intentionality, armed with the time-tested process of anchor resetting. The world is yours, my friends. Do your prospects a favor–– break up their current delusional infatuations and give them something much better to fall in love with!

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