Last week we had the opportunity to lead a socially distanced live training in the beautiful city of Nashville, TN. Honestly, it was great to be interacting in a live setting once again. During those two days, a conversation over lunch turned personal in the best possible way — and it gave me something worth sharing as we head into the Thanksgiving holiday.
On the first day of training, I had the opportunity to have lunch and dinner with some of our client team members. At one point the conversation turned toward how this Thanksgiving would look different from most we have seen in our lifetimes, yet there is much to be thankful for, even in the madness of 2020. As we shared stories about our personal and professional lives, we found a common theme of adoption at our table. Immediately, I felt the call to share a part of my story.
At Braintrust, we train people worldwide about the concept of being a trusted advisor to our clients. I have taken some time to ponder exactly what makes a trusted advisor. My sincere hope is that a part of my story will help you think about the importance of these two simple yet powerful words in your personal and professional life. To do this, I am going to take you back over fifteen years.
A Concert, a Spark, and a Seed
My wife Amy and I are blessed with three children. Our youngest daughter Kayla is our angel from China. Kayla came home with us when she was only 17 months old and is now a beautiful 14-year-old eighth-grader. When we started the adoption process, Amy and I needed to choose an agency to represent us through a three-year maze of paperwork, shifting timelines, and seemingly constant setbacks. We needed a trusted advisor.
The incredible journey of adoption began after attending a Steven Curtis Chapman concert. We watched a life-changing video at intermission by The Show Hope Foundation (www.showhope.org) about the state of orphans around the world, and the seed was planted. There are an estimated 163 million orphans in the world — a number that is both staggering and clarifying. (Back2Back Ministries does remarkable work in this space if you want to learn more.)
As we drove home from that concert, I will never forget our oldest daughter Abby sitting in the back seat saying, "We should do that." Amy and I smiled and told her to go back to sleep. About six months later, Amy proclaimed from the couch in our family room, "I have never felt more called by God to do what I am about to tell you." After literally less than five minutes of conversation, we were all in. The process started the next day. As Show Hope says: it only takes a spark.
You Cannot Navigate the Journey Alone
Once we decided to move forward, we knew this journey was impossible to do alone. We needed a trusted advisor to serve as our guide. After doing our research, we decided to work with America World (AW) out of Virginia (www.awaa.org). The people at America World and their values aligned with ours completely. We knew they had the heart to serve us and the expertise to guide us through a system that felt, at times, impossible to navigate.
Their vision: "building families according to God's design of adoption, while caring for vulnerable children around the world." Their mission: "every adoptable orphan to be placed in a Christian home." We did not need to be convinced. The alignment was immediate, and the relationship was built on trust from day one.
Why America World Earned Our Trust
It was evident that AW was there to serve us and help us solve problems as they came — and there were many. They promised to be with us every step of the way, and they kept that promise. They were invested in our dream of bringing our baby girl home.
Here is what made them exceptional as trusted advisors. They were not transactional. They were not fact-based and self-focused. They were not aggressive. They established both personal and professional trust with us at every turn. In their approach, they reduced many moments of stress and anxiety while we processed the maze of social workers, the Chinese government's requirements, and dossier preparation. They also helped us in the quiet periods, when time simply passed and we had no new information to hold onto.
The adoption process was supposed to take six months. It lasted over three years. America World served as our guide, our sage, and our coach through all of it — and the story could not have ended better. Every day mattered. We were matched with our daughter at the perfect time. We could not have done it without them.
The Seven Secrets of a Trusted Advisor
As you go into the Thanksgiving holiday and reflect on your families and your customers, the question is this: are you a trusted advisor for the people in your story? To help you think through that, here are seven principles worth sitting with this week. Notice they all start with the same letter — not by accident.
- Serve your customers. Put their needs ahead of your own agenda, every time.
- Solve their problems. Be a resource before you are a salesperson. Show up with answers, not just questions.
- Solutions that make them the hero. The best trusted advisors never take the credit. They make the client the success story.
- Story: be invested in their journey. Know where they came from, where they are going, and what matters to them personally. People trust those who know their story.
- Stick through the ups and downs. America World did not disappear when the news was bad or the wait stretched on. Neither should you.
- Situational awareness: meet them where they are. Do not deliver a scripted response into a messy situation. Read the room, read the moment, and adjust.
- Show hope. Even in the hardest stretches, the best advisors hold the vision when their client cannot. That is not optimism for optimism's sake — that is trust in action.
Are You a Trusted Advisor in Your Story?
The concept of a trusted advisor is not reserved for sales teams or executive relationships. It applies to every relationship in your life where someone is counting on you to guide them through something they cannot navigate alone. That might be a client. It might be a direct report. It might be a friend in a difficult season.
At Braintrust, we are deeply thankful for those of you who read our content, listen to our podcasts, and trust us with your business. We do not take that for granted. We hope we are genuinely serving as trusted advisors to you in all we do.
And one more time, in case you felt a spark: for more information on how you can help, check out the Show Hope website at www.showhope.org. It only takes a spark.
If any of this resonated and you want to talk about what building a trusted-advisor culture looks like inside your organization, we would love to have that conversation.
